OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
i just looked at my contacts and realized i saved the pizza hut girl's number as "fckucin pizza" the other night.
he was so high, he talked to my goldfish for an hour telling him the dangers of overfeeding.
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
We all make mistakes. Just lock them up deep down inside your mind so they can surface as weird sexual fantasies it takes your therapist years to decipher when your 40
I just walked in on my sixteen year old sister soaking her tampon in vodka. I go to Berkeley. And they think she's the good daughter.
And that facial hair. He might as well shave it so it spells "douche" on one cheek and "nozzle" on the other.
once he tried to wake me up from my hangover nap to have sex, that's when things went downhill. he had to go.
sitting in the prison waiting room in my boyfriends clothes. looooong story.
We won like $80 last night at the casino, so if we get the Plan B we still have enough to get your basic bitch latte from Dunkin. Calm down.
Randomize
