Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
This shit I'm taking feels like I've eaten every burrito in the world and chased that with an aquarium of hot sauce.
What a dumb baby whore.
The important thing is not that we avoid making mistakes, but that we avoid learning from them.
Thanks for the cold. I shartted and sat through a whole soccer game. James made 3 scores.
its 2pm. u awake yet?
ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.
I'm so tired I just poured monster in my coffee.
And it tastes incredible.
And I have chest pains.
I am too high to deal with coming home to 11 naked people in my living room
Dude I'm so clean right now. Like I feel insulted that I can pass a piss test.
So besides your brother walking in on you shaving and singing "I'm gonna get asssss" how was your night
I've decided to give up hard drugs for the rest of the year.
how did you set a fucking salad on fire????????
The angle I tried to shoot a load on her face was unfortunate. I accidentally came on the David Bowie tribute she had out. Oddly, that made it more erotic.
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
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