yo - did your mom get a boob job (I think she did)
I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
He thanked me for being "his little blond pogo stick last night". Good thing?
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
Apparently I tried to convince him to sleep with me by showing him that I could do dips....
That's where the buck stops? Buying girlfriends online? THAT is where you draw the line?!
My roommate was being an ass so I put everyone's drinks/shots on his tab for the entire night. Then when we left he was telling me how he got out cheaper than last time.
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
No ambien sex tonight. I just ate two hotdogs with chilli and onions.
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
I'm sorry for drunkenly throwing a spoon at you and then laughing at your pain.
PEOPLE ARE STILL EATING FAJITAS IN DROVES. BY THE CASELOAD. THERES A FORKLIFT OF SIZZLING MEATS.
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
My GF, FWB and Side piece are all booty calling me. I’m a victim of my sexual success
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