Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
Okay so if I'm going to keep referring to my hangover in the third person it needs a name.
Since your rent is paid til the first, we decided to use your apartment as the beer pong room. We apologize in advance for losing your security deposit.
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
I'm just going to lay in a blanket cocoon of self pity for the next few months.
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
I found a guy who will take me to the Olive Garden and he is CONVENTIONALLY ATTRACTIVE.
you weren't there so I had to flirt with him on your behalf
I've had to take two showers today and it's not even 1 o'clock. Why won't this weekend wash off?
Sorry I called bc I needed help peeing outside
But I did it
First post college job and I got fired within a week. Something tells me that adulthood isn't going to be as much fun as sex and the city led me to believe.
My ex just brought my grandpa weed. Not sure how I feel about this.
I was watchin a porno and I sware I saw that dude at the bar at applebees the other night
Omg worst high ever. I'm watching Parks and Rec, and all i can think about is how andy, leslie, and tom are my closest friends. Forever alone.
Randomize
