And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
Yes I hit her with my car. Yes I gave her a ride home. And yes she gave me her number. What's the problem?
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
just had Stella and stale goldfish for breakfast under the watchful eyes of an inflatable cactus and 5 llama pinatas. Cinco de mayo success!
Ok in all seriousness. Alcohol intake is now restricted for me. I found handcuffs in my trunk.
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
Discovery: bouncers seem to get really upset about fire
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
So your contact has been changed to "jizz weave" in my phone. Now, as strange and random as that may be, I'm slightly embarrassed to say that I have more than one contact that fits that description so please identify yourself.
I walked into her room to find her sitting on the end of her bed with her heads in her hands talking to herself. She kept muttering things like "What? How? No. What? I don't --- How?" $10 says she's pregnant.
I'll see to your $10 and raise you $40.
You tried to ride his dick and fell off. Then tried to ride the floor. That's why he hasn't called back
Remember the time you cried about coconuts
Apparently I called down to the hotel front desk and begged them to bring us pizza. They brought us tea.
Randomize
