so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
then you put baby powder on the bottom of your feet and walked to your room so "ladies would follow the footprints"
dude literally just took me 4 trips to take out the recycling from last night. we need to have parties like this more often
even the AIR tastes like tequila.
Do you ever just look at me and get embarrassed?
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
What if our hands were octopus tentacles?
You're an idiot.
Could have had sex with an ex NFL kicker last night.
That would've been embarrassing.
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
No more chicken and waffles served by drag queens at 2 AM. :(
We should buy t shirt guns and blow eggs out of them at his house. Bachelorette party
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
we found her on the beach half naked talking to a palm tree
Which half?
They got skeletons in the booths to enforce social distancing.
Thought they were weekend at berniesing that shit at first.
Randomize
