I may or may not have screamed I'M ON A BOAT while having sex...on a boat. I think I was born to have sex with him.
someone shit in a solo cup and left it at the base of the stairs. fuck orlando dude.
her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low.
She was the shot vending machine at the party. But free.
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
Right now he's sitting in the chair pointing to me to go away. He's trying to have quiet time with his penis.
You crowd surfed from beer pong into the bathroom where you spent the rest of the night, also I have your wallet
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...
I can control the tv with my phone while pooping on the second floor. I thought you should know for future reference
I'm 10 cats away from completing my post divorce transformation.
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
I puked in the back of my mom's new car because I had too much to drink at Chilis. I think I just hit rock bottom.
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
Randomize
