the new term for farting is butt boxing.
When we ran out of red solo cups we switched to Starbucks cups for beer pong... Who doesn't want to live in Seattle?
Just pulled over to throw up in a day care parking lot while the kids were outside playing. The adults were mortified.
I'm more impressed with the spaghetti smoothie at the present moment.
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
i love that youre following in my footsteps.. pissing yourself on your birthday is an honor and a privlege
I smell like fire and strippers. Successful sunday funday.
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
Santa was walking around downtown handing out stuff at the bars. He gave me a free eyebrow wax. I think he's trying to tell me something
I think if I set up a series of baby gates up the stairs each one more difficult to undo then the last that should be able to stop your drunk vagina.
I woke up with my face covered in mustard. Your mom said I ate hotdogs like a pornstar
It's funny when you can't take a fishing boat because you fucked the captains wife
I think I might start referring to your vagina as a separate being now
I'm at a sex party and there's a guy in an ICP jersey and trip pants. I see now that this is the moment in the movie of my life I recognize I have a problem
they were drunk. and loud. and now they're drunk and quiet. or dead, you never know.
Randomize
