Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
on the brightside, the semester can only get better from getting a dui at 8 am on the first day.
your optimism is becoming unhealthy
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
Beware of calls from Dad. I just had a longer than I would care to admit convo about the ididarod. Apparently it starts tomorrow.
I just yelled at my mom for getting me circumcised without my permission. That drunk
I'm lowering my standards just so I can get laid, but I draw the line when a guy spells cool kewl
Someone please drive out to my house to bring me a beer.. There are some in the fridge but I just can't get up
I've taken a shot every five minutes for the past twenty. His valentines cupcakes are going to be a fucking delicious vodka induced mess. Thinking about putting vodka in this next batch. I'm the best girlfriend.
I'm not drunk because I think my blood just is alcohol from last night so being drunk is sober. If that makes sense
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
One. But meh. I upped my age limit to like 29 hoping I'll match with this one fedex guy that delivers packages to my work
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
Randomize
