Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
My cat gives me a boner
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
i just deleted quailman, hot hawaiian dude, appalachian swimmer, and connecticut from my phone
As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.
She looked at it and said "your dick is like the golden gate bridge."
he walkred up to the manager at dennys and said 'look, my friends passed out in your bathroom, can i go get her?'
Seriously? What part of meeting at Oktoberfest while I'm wearing a dirndl, double fisting, and making out with random guys screams "i'm girlfriend material"?!
Day #3 of being the only sober person at the bar. This is depression.
well we called the liquor store to tell them to stay open five more minutes so we could make it and they recognized our voices. I've never been more proud.
On celebration of the Supreme Court ruling I feel it is our patriotic duty to have a threesome
I like the new guy, he keeps beer in the fridge.
You still owe me one bodily function mess clean up.
You pee on the floor one time and you never hear the end of it...
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
Randomize
