I don't even know how sober sex starts anymore
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
I feel like college is just one giant drunken trip to Taco Bell
Scored tix to flower show. Do we want to go drunk on Saturday or hungover on Sunday? Only two options.
Walk-of-shaming home in that dress you got arrested in. Six guys called out your name when I walked past. I've never been more proud of us.
You are NEVER going to guess whose penis was JUST in my mouth!!!
I'll give you a hint, we ate paste with him in kindergarten.
by "whatever happens, happens" i meant "we are totally hooking up again on tuesday." i thought that was obvious.
He acted like he was sleep fucking because I woke up to him screwing me in the middle of the night and he had is eyes closed and was mumbling things the whole time and wouldn't respond to me.
Is that even possible?
I called him by the wrong name to test him and he instantly stopped, rolled over and acted like he was still sleeping...I think he might break up with me tomorrow.
When did it become appropriate to call your mother the morning after? While still naked in bed? WHEN?!
and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that
I mean it's up to you where you want to sleep but I'm telling you you're going to hear us have sex no matter what room you're in.
Fair enough
I miss you.
Yeah, I don't want to have sex.
I forgot to respond before, I was apologizing for confusing sex with secret Santa.
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
Randomize
