Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
I just gift wrapped bread.
Someday soon you'll wake up next to a bottle of jameson and a half eaten lean cuisine and then you'll be just like me.
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
Well call me tomorrow, it's a great story that may lead to me being fired and/or possibly being buried in a shallow grave somewhere out in wine country.
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
Was I drunk or did Alex not show up with 100 rainbow Jell-O shots?
I mean, it was a fun hookup and he's cute and whatnot, but he wouldn't go down on me. Plus he's a republican. Idk why but those things feel like they go hand in hand.
Why the fuck is there a goat in the kitchen
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
I’ll call you later. There’s a jilted trophy wife looking for a revenge fuck at my door
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