do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
I get a nice feeling when i open my fridge and see it filled with thirty beers and half a leftover jimmy johns pickle.
My phone really needs to stop auto correcting "library" to "ovary".
Besides the whole peeing blood for a week thing, it was the best sex of my life.
Just promise me we won't die tonight. I can't have an autopsy report that reads "stomach contents: Tequila and semen."
Well. It was around 3 or 4 in the morning. He ran into the woods. Wearing moccasins. Holding an extension cord. He was trying to catch a deer. That about sums up the awesomeness of the night.
Of dear god, I've been waiting to have rug burn like this since I got bored of my vibrator 2 months ago
Some guy wearing a horse mask just knocked on my door and started whinnying. I opened the door and he was like, "...oh sorry, wrong room..." so awk.
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
You told your boyfriend he needed to fuck you in the tree because it would make you guys one with nature.
Did he?
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