I just tried to pick my 105-lb puppy up and accidentally fingered its asshole
There are some things we keep to ourselves Brian
walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
Before we started fucking, he laid me on the bed, and asked my what my sleep number was, so that i would be "comfy"
I just won 10 dollars from out chugging the bar tender and I found out that the baby aint mine in the last hour. I don't even care if l get laid tonight any more.
I told him I don't date guys unless they play a musical instrument. So, he's here and he brought a kazoo.
This is so pathetic it makes me miss snorting lines alone in my room listening to 'one more drink'.
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
this is terrible I feel like i'm trapped in a cage with a wild republican
He got weirdly turned on by the video of my cat licking nacho cheese off my finger.
That moment when I wear the same thing I did to a motel nooner to my family's Christmas party... Ho Hoety Ho bitches
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
Sorry I had sex in your backseat while everyone was in the car
It's quite alright. I found his shorts in my backseat, not sure what he was wearing when we dropped him off
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
Randomize
