Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
I love how my cats smell like pot.
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
Girl it's 3:30 get your life together and come enjoy a bowl, some coffee and a brownie with me
I caved man... I fucked her so vigorously, desperately trying to correct her wonky eye. My determination was relentless.
You are a terrible person.
I just try to be optimistic...
Flacco has been sacked like 7 times. His name also auto corrects to Flaccid. That's so sad
Hurry up I'm getting mooned by a hobo
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
Your life has no conflict it's just a blur of sex and Netflix
Stay positive! You think people like sad vaginas? NO! You'll get some!
Scientific fact: if he makes a face like a demonic dog when he's fucking you, makes it easier to fuck without feelings.
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
I visited the library for the first time in my college career tonight and I got laid. I think I'm gonna come back...
Randomize
