you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
She is totally STD
Is it a bad omen that my phone auto corrects dtf to STD
As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.
Apparently throwing up on your own cape is still a party foul
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
I need to stop having one night stands with guys in my building so I can have someone to borrow milk from without it being awkward
I used to not like fucking fat girls but with her gut clapping against her boobs, its like a standing ovation ever time.
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
We had sex on a lawn chair while fireworks were going off last night. It was unavoidable that I got mosquito bites all over my ass
have you ever seen all dogs go to heaven this is important
Instead of more alcohol, I decided to drink tea. Lets slow clap it out for me
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
I feel like I should treat myself every time I find out I'm not pregnant. Is there a pie company that delivers??
i wish i could say that was the first 40 year old woman from the circus I nailed
I wanna get to the point where I can just send a question mark and get an exclamation point in response
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