Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
i just discovered a movie that charlize theron is a sex addict. i think my prayers have been answered
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
While we were having sex he told me "this is what you get for not parking my car right" I have never drove his car. He was that kind of weird.
I need to get my pants from under your porch. People are asking questions.
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
no one is here. wer drinking in the beer garden in the dark and we stole a bucket of blue paint off the sidewalk. now her legs are blue.
Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.
I said to him "i can't have sex with anyone in my friend's living room" then he said "we can move the air mattress into the kitchen"
I'm drawing the line at your vagina. I will not accompany you to get that pierced and/or tattooed. There's got to be some mystery to our relationship.
Note to self...boner negates all verbal agreements ...got it
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
I don't think stranger penis made your tonsils bleed
How does one take the "you're the best sex I've ever had but I'm marrying someone that's sub-par in the sack" mind fuck?
I pity the fool.
Thanks Mr T.
Randomize
