is it a bad sign that i now think of my run-ins with cops as "skill building seminars"?
um, yeah. i think it is.
I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
Its what jesus would do if there were bud light in his time. I feel obligated.
What hospital were we in last night? Insurance needs to know
hr gave me pretxwk salad and a doubke shot of grey goose. i approve! tou guys are a beautidil couple.
I'm wearing the jeans from casino night. Tell me why I have a napkin in my pocket that says 'dont fear me'? I'm hoping it was just a coincidence.
My birthday was already very memorable but her punching me in the face put it over the top. I love being 25 and still not giving a fuck.
you had acid sex with the barista. why is my bucket list your tuesday?
there is a dorito bag in my car full of my mouth blood
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
It's National Whipped Cream Day, prep those nips
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
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