What kind of soap washes out shame, bad decisions, and whiskey?
Irish Spring?
im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
You tried taking his shirt off at the bar. He was 37 and married with kids.
Either I'm spending too much time drinking or my perfume is starting to smell like a pineapple vodka.
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
This hangover is so bad, we are pregaming Chinese food with pizza.
I'm sorry I peed on your everything.
Do you know how hard it is to be while you're high with a chuck Norris poster in the bathroom?
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
who knew tequila and Christmas cookies would go so well together
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
Panties = found
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