She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
She slapped his drink out of his hand to get him to leave the bar while he and I were having an intense debate about the lyrics to mmmbop
It's a sign that no dudes december is about to start: I have a yeast infection.
He said he only likes girls with a sense of humor, after he took his pants off I understood why
She's like a connoisseur of porn. Her collection has things in it I never even knew existed. She even has an Italian batman porno. Where has she been all my life?
I always congratulate people on their vaginal emancipation.
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
Who ever is in the stall next to me is crying and it sounds like they're doing massive amounts of blow too. Finals for your ass huh.
Guy just came in wearing only shorts, on his hand was written - my name is ... Call ... And tell them where i am, thanx - in permanent marker, ordered his favorite dish, and left w/out touching it. It's snowing outside.
Come over. I've made 2 dinners and so many cocktails. I'm a 50's housewife with no family.
Yeah. Well last night I sold my shoes to a man who I'm pretty sure has a weird foot fetish for $150 cash.
So the day after the 4th I'm sitting here drinking Molson and watching NHL free agent frenzy. From patriotic American to drunken Canadian in 24 hours flat. Booyah.
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
I'm at this party and a blind kid just walked in and asked "where is the fucking pong table"
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