So..he puked on my dress and I had to walk back to the dorms in his little sisters Scooby Doo pajamas.
I don't know you.
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
I still cannot believe I yelled at every guy at the bar "you wanna get in this clam?!"
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
They're calling for 20 inches of snow but I'll have a dirtbike for emergency trips to the liquor store. Even if I crash it won't hurt.
He ended up walking out of his bedroom and told me to look at the nonexistent fire he was holding in his hand. Im upset I didn't take those shrooms.
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
I can only send "I want your dick" texts to so many guys before I accidentally over-book myself. I need a day planner.
Remember that time you came over to my house and I was on the porch naked and eating peanut butter?
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
Just used an eyelash curler to open my beer since I didn't have a bottle opener. Things are starting to look up.
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
Next guy I fuck must be a cowboy
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
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