Partly cloudy chance of praying to the porcelin gods
he wanted me to put the condom on for him. I was high and couldn't figure it out.. so instead we played xbox.
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
I ate her out for so long I might actually shit a vagina
Getting a vibrator would be like waving the white flag of surrender in this war against my vagina and its hormone army.
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
From now on I forbid you to refer to it as a "bed". From now on you must only use the phrase "sex wagon".
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
About to go make a man out of a 24 year old boy
As I shove my ninth taquito of the day into my mouth...
Picking our battles
Honey you are a beautiful woman but I came over to eat your pizza and fuck your brother. And you're out of pizza.
My mom found my empty case that I hid in my room and just said "now why don't you be a responsible underaged drinker and throw it in the recycling" and walked away. I'm in shock.
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
Randomize
