This is not my ceiling
her vagina probably looks like a grenade went off in a deli
my mom just asked me what a queef is. she needs to stop watching south park
Went to the career fair today..I handed out many resumes to find out later that they say I have a bachelor o farts degree...Top that.
He was completely serious when he said my boobs were like "majestic white clouds."
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
What is a reasonable amount of condoms to keep in my condom wallet without it being creepy that I have too many?
You were hugging the toilet and shouting "don't let fatty eat me" through the closed door.
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
My saturday night consisted of sewing my Halloween costume and watching Blues Clues
You actually...sewed your costume?
Why are there 17 orders of shrimp lo mein in the bathtub?
I guarantee you he will only fuck with old bitches from now on
He’s older
Like “has a job and pays his bills” older or “still watches porn on DVD because he can’t figure out the Internet” older?
Randomize
