I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
Just bought lingerie with the intention of wearing it as a shirt. It's going to be that kind of weekend.
you handed the cop a condom last night and said "it's all about protect and serve right?"
I knew it was gonna be a rough night when the guys next to us at Relay for Life started shot gunning beers and yelling "This ones for all the hot chicks that went bald because of cancer". It kinda went downhill from there....
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
You sat on my knee, like Santa, while I peed.
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
This chick at the gym, just informed me I was super funny this weekend. Especially when I untied her friends bikini top after throwing up in the women's restroom. SWEET black out chronicles has another story
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
bullshit you weren't drunk, you pointed at me and said my cigarette was empty
On a happier note, I can fit in my old shorts. Dope does have its perks
It seems that I didn’t convey clearly enough how well and truly fucked we are, Jack. Listen to me very closely: we are DEAD.
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