I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
Dude, you just left me a 3 minute voicemail of pop rocks in your mouth. Im sitting right next you
just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
"Tonight I'm turning swine flu into an std" this might be how zombies come about. Peace civilization.
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
why didn't you say something constructive like "stop chugging that vodka"?
I'm not sure how exactly, but this funeral has turned into a ridiculous night of drinking games
Someone at all my grapes... if it was you or one of your hoodrat friends I swear to god I'll shit in your shampoo
There's a patch of dead grass from where you would notoriously throw up after every good night in July. This summer was great.
You know when you meet a penis that looks like it was made out of all your hopes and dreams?
We really shouldn't need this many nicknames for the women you've had sex with.
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
Randomize
