Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
I only want to make out with him. Unless I get hungry. In that case I will take him home and screw him as a distraction from eating.
Like, actually questioning if you ate dog shit last night
Boobs are also good for catching the vodka gummy bears that miss my mouth
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
I came back and almost ran over two people passed out in my driveway I've never met before in my life
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
No dude, he just dipped his cigarette info ranch dressing and lit it. He's said he normally doesn't do that but it's Memorial Day.
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
I'm in Home Depot and I can feel the straight bob the builders staring at me. I bet it's like I have a rainbow arrow pointing at me.
Saw your dad at the bar last night... And again this morning when he left. Told you not to mess with me bitch.
If youre worried about being stabbed, you probably shouldnt be there.
How did I end up with the cock ring?!
He wouldn’t know a good thing if it bit him on the ass. Which, btw, I did.
Randomize
