that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
i feel like even strangers are annoyed with me because of how drunk i was last night
It's refreshing to see you in something that is stained with something other than vomit and spilled alcohol.
so i had a dream that andrew cuomo ate me out. guess who i'm voting for?
u know how some weekends you just wanna go out and ruin a relationship? this is one of those weekends
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
New carpet is nice. I'm making carpet angels. Like a fresh snowfall.
Ive seen him cuddling a giant inflatable seahorse. Nothing could be creepier than that.
Pregnancy test = positive. Hope you still have our old guess who game 'cause daddy elimination begins now.
The port-o-potty that I peed in last night didn't actually have a toilet in it. And i never told anyone until this moment.
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
Hey, I'm just seeing how you're doing and letting you know I fucked your dad last night. Don't fuck with me.
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
Randomize
