Have you ever slowed down next to the oldest people on the highway while getting road head just to see their extended reaction?
The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
Holy jesus god. My teeth taste like street.
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
beyond obliterated. i recall legitimately trying to use a ballpoint pen as eyeliner.
Need toilet paper. Napkins suck. Slowly running out of those two and the bleeding hasn't stopped. Your cat is next
Picking up hoes with my dad is going to make it a little harder, but ay, if thats how he wants to bond after 23 years, Ill give it a shot
Operation: sleep in every bed at the boys' house is nearing completion. Now at 5/9. I AM GOLDILOCKS AND NO ONE CAN STOP ME
Thanks for taking care of me. I hope I didn't pee in your car.
It was like something out of a fucked up fairy tale. He just crowdsurfed over to her while riding a keg, said "come sail with me", and then the crowd carried them off into the night. What.
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
It does not feel like it was just this morning that I had a penis in multiple cavities of my body
He brought me another shot of rum, ice and my underwear when I woke up.
What a gentleman.
I KNOW, right?!
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