Remember how we wr so drunk last nite we cldnt find whr i shot my load? ...found some of it.
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
I'm surrounded by too many unhungover people.
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
He tried to bang a 300 pounder last night. No joke. I shotgunned a tall boy in a bar cuz the bartender didn't crack the beer. Cant wait till Nashville.
She made a roadhead CD. Can I marry her?
Think of this as an opportunity. Like Jesus just opened up his closet, and inside is an endless supply of huge, beautiful cock.
Remember when we had a keg, and then another 5 cases... and like 30 people drank it all?
Everything hurts.
I had to show the prof your text saying that I could pick up your midterm for you. I covered the part of the screen saying you weren't there because you were about to have morning choke sex.
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
Lesbians had sex in my bed last night. It's a thing of pride
If I woke up in a pillar of smoke I suppose that's a sign right
The porch is breathing.
STAY OUT OF MY SHROOMS YOU CUNT
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
Randomize
