By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
I learned his name tonight. This now makes him a real person. Obviously, I no longer want to sleep with him.
whats the proper etiquette for returning a closet door to a random girl you met and do not know her name?
I smelled my fingers after she left and they smelt like sugar cookies. I want that one again.
More likely there's a very shell-shocked cat wandering around somewhere, covered in potato peelings
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
when I came to get Jamie there was a cop standing outside with her, made me roll down my window to tell me "she's got to go cause she won't keep her shirt buttoned"
How do you feel? I threw up in a towel. Also, a lot of other things.
Okay. I am working on pulling a tooth out of my mouth. Call me.
How many people slept in the bouncy castle last night?
4 guys, 1 girl. Pretty sure were gonna have to pay the cleaning fee
I had to ask him for a dick pic. Do you know how refreshing that was?
Yeah then you killed that bottle of Bacardi in under 20 minutes. So much for being an organ donor.
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
really who shits their pants then locks themselves out of their apartment? ... I threw my underwear out in a random bathroom
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