I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
guys are only as good as the porn they watch
Just found the bucket list I wrote when I was high...somehow I dont think "jello swimming pool" is gonna happen.
If you don't remember anything tomorrow, this is to remind you that you asked me in secret to build a bobsled with you and re-enact Cool Runnings.
What a great world we live in when USPS can tell you that your drugs have been delivered.
I'm in Starbucks carrying the boxes wine and the hubcap. So many judging looks.
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
She said she forgot something.. and when she came out she was carrying a garden gnome, and a bottle of vodka. she was too hot to question it.
Well I took a spicy wing shit in a field this morning.
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
Why are there 17 orders of shrimp lo mein in the bathtub?
I just thought that if your brother was ever going to invite me over again, he probably shouldn't catch me fucking you in his bathroom.
Randomize
