Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
Dry humping a girl for an hour and then jizzing in your pants doesn't count as losing it.
The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
we got 12 live crabs and then we got really stoned and know we're playing with the crabs. thats nom watermellon nom. now i'm plaing with a crap whos such a gentleman
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
Just high enough for therapy.
I don't know what happened this summer, I've lost my sense of morality. All I do now is work, get drunk, and have sex near national landmarks.
I'm pretty sure he's playing the harmonica in my shower right now. I just really need to pee.
well that's the third time this semester that I've projectile vomited walking to class in front of dozens of people
Apparently I was having great conversation with this 48 year old on grindr & he was concerned as to how I was getting home.
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
Randomize
