margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
yeah for some reason your penis didn't fit in my mouth the other day
Drinking wine. Reading twilight. On a Friday night. Biggest loser contest. First Place.
And i laid in the yard with carrots on my chest cause i wanted a bunny
No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.
at last call she tried to get the bartender to fill her flask. when he refused, i had to stop her from trying to pour the rest of her beer in there.
I think it's safe to say me, swords and vodka can never be aloud in the same room again.
The only requirement is that his name is Kevin... All other factors don't matter to drunk me. Drunk me likey Kevins.
Her life is filled with shit luck. Its like mother nature is having her period and just taking it out on her specifically.
I feel like "stop licking my face" isn't something that needs to be repeated twice
you know what would be perfect? if you flew in on a horse/cat holding taco bell and then you swooped me up and took me to disney world and it was magical
You should help rebuild my confidence with your dick. Altruism: Pass it on.
We should buy t shirt guns and blow eggs out of them at his house. Bachelorette party
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
Randomize
