I have the sudden urge to buy a Snuggie and wear it to the grocery store.
I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
I hope the kids appreciate the fact that I jizzed on her instead of on their slide.
it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
Hahah fuuuck, bag pipers played around me while I threw up. Literally
I pulled my bra out of my dress and handed it to my mom..at cocktail hour during the wedding.
I want a calm night. Not one where I wake up to you topless and bloody.
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
10/10 would definitely still fuck you dressed as squirrel
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
Yes ma'am. I'm attracted to unconventional people, you know that.
True. I can't judge, half of my sexual partners I only know a false first name & a number. We all have our kinks.
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
Randomize