ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
Then she called me a home wrecking whore.
dont they live in a condo? that doesnt count.
I just got hit on by my highschool french teacher. I need to stop going to this bar.
How many times can I tell him I wasnt expecting sex before he realizes I'm just too lazy to shave all the time?
Isn't it statistically impossible for THAT many ugly people to be in one place at one time?
And by hung out you mean you were in my bed for 5 minutes while your penis was in my mouth.
Post-shopping-cart-scooter-jousting victory fuck?
The forecast for tonight is alcohol and low expectations.
You're the only meteorologist I listen to.
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
I feel like I put a fire out with my hand but idk if that was a dream or not
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
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