yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
We just stood on the porch wondering how you managed to puke up a whole piece of bologna
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
U can find me on my couch hungover eatin tuna evaluating my life
So he says to my dad "I'll pull out of your daughter but I'm not going to apologize". Yea, my night was fun.
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
Actually, I may scrap this entire plan. I just realized that I had sex with a guy with his own whiskey commercial.
THE FASTEST WAY TO MY HEART IS THROUGH FAMILY SIZED BAGS OF GENERIC BRAND CHEESE BALLS
Who else will cuddle and watch the Bachelor with me then finger bang me during the rose ceremony
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
i said cake fell into my bra, you stood up and yelled "Im coming soldier", leaped acrossed the couch and started motorboating my boobs. i would have been cool with it if your mom didnt keep calling me the "lesbiainizer"
Ooooh no. Jesus take the wheel, or Moses. SOMEBODY TAKE THE WHEEL
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