I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
Some dude just bet me $8 I couldn't smoke a pack of cigarettes in an hour...It sounds stupid, but I really wanna do it. If I survive, I'll have $8 and it'll look good on my resume.
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
can you explain why there is a dead rabbit in my front seat?
idk, I had a turtle in mine.
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
Either this is the best sandwich I've ever had, or my stomach is just relieved to have something in it that's not Red Bull or semen.
Any day you don't mysteriously wake up in the garbage is a good day.
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
He ran into the room yelling "attack! Attack!", jumped on top of me on the air mattress, popped the air mattress, and then we had victory sex, because he was proud of popping it.
As soon as they started using chocolate milk as a chaser for captain Morgan, I thought l it'd be best to leave.
I. Did. In fact. Sprain. My liver. This. Weekend.
I just wanna get drunk and watch Tarzan with you is that to much to ask?!?
Crawl out into the sunshine and off your vibrator for 7 minutes
you need to drop off my dinner before you go see him because i'm not gonna wait until you're finished fucking him to get my damn chinese food
Randomize