And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
Just did free shots of tequila at a walmart. Hello Mexico
I was still in a towel. We hadn't even started drinking yet and the champagne bottle dropped and exploded literally up into my vagina.
Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
That girl from the bar sent me a text saying that she wants to wear my cock as a hat. A cock hat. Is that good or bad?
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
I ate pizza in bed, sans pants, and then carved a pumpkin. FUNCTIONING ADULT MOTHERFUCKERS!
There is a check pinned to the wall at Connor's. It's a check I wrote for $1,000,000... To you. Clearly you made out well on St. Patrick's day. Thanks for being too shitfaced to remember to grab that.
That's pretty intense. There aren't many people I would pick over a burrito
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
Don't trim your pubes if you've been drinking. I can't believe I have to tell you more than once.
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