Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
That Joe Wilson reference just earned you a blow job, Mister!
So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
"Whiskey Cheerios" was a terribly great idea.
I feel like you pissing on my ping pong table isn't something to be proud of.
I had to step in when you tried to make it rain baking powder on my sister
hold on, were in the kitchen painting a yellow brick road to my vagina on my leg with black light paint.
If you end up at a gay bar on a tuesday night in steelers pjs, does that mean youve hit rock bottom?
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
Somewhere out there, on several phones belonging to strangers, exists a video of me rapping Baby Got Back on stage in four inch heels that I stole from the drag queen. Also I made out with the chick with the octopus tattoo.
You have the best birthdays
Wall of shame with a backpack full of beer bottles, cowboy hat in hand, and a handlebar mustache. I was applauded by a passing car
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
we're so committed to being not committed
No. It's going to be "I'm mad that it took you so long to get over here" angry sex.
Randomize
