he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
Are you drinking alone?
no, i'm watching house
That doesn't count.
wtf, then i'm always alone
You know it's an interesting night when you drunkenly scream at your boss, "You'd make a HORRIBLE OBGYN!! You're hands are ENORMOUS!"
I want to be a jewelry store heckler. "Hey man, is she really worth it"
My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
I am solely responsible for the birth of their child. I mean, I did push them into the room and hold the door shut yelling "punch that kitty!". It has to be a sign.
She pulled out a handful of chest hair. And then gave the room a Brave Heartesque speech.
Haha! I've never met his girlfriend, so my main focus will be not saying,"you're the only person in this room that doesn't know what my vagina feels like."
I just remember going to take a piss and looking down on the floor and thinking "that looks comfortable" and then I was out.
Trying to roll joints on a seadoo in the middle of a lake on a windy night. -Juststonerthings
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
I was gonna be Romantic and write your name in emoji eggplants but A's are hard
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
Randomize