I just saw a hot homeless man
I just found out my first birthday was a keg party. Suddenly everything makes sense
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
I woke up last night a kitchen floor with my shirt off and I love America written on my leg in eye liner
I feel awful. The bartender added me on Facebook and there's chips all over the bathroom floor
It's my day off, I'm going to Target to check out Moms in yoga pants
I've amended my previous statement: I'm not allowed to put in my two weeks till I ask out the waitress. Now I have motivation on two levels
I need your opinion, is it ACTUALLY sweet that a booty call offered to walk me home with an umbrella because it was raining, or is that just low standards?
she brought her phone charger to the bar this bitch is ready to drink
hes sooooo boring!!! I feel like I’m in a relationship with myself now. I have an 8 inch dildo under my bed, THATS how much I’m in a relationship with myself.
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