Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
Me liking this guy is the best diet ever. Do I want this cookie...or do I want to get laid.
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
I dont think a "sorry ive slept with most of your teammates" text will do much
Mom just posted ur drunk pix from Cancun in the newly made "My not-so-fantastic son" album. Thought you should know.
We thought she was passed out on the toilet, but she raised her head to tell me the word I couldn't remember was "empathize." Then she puked blood and passed out.
my boobs are worth more now than the blue book value of my car.
Bring your friend that fell asleep in the bathroom for my friend.
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
Oh yes there is. Now I'm the sad one. Please organize my life. And I will demoralize yours.
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
he's like a horny 3rd grader on cocaine. he needs a leash
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
I cannot belive our party caught on fire
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