He just called shotgun on the way to the squad car.
Article 1, law 1, section 1 of the apartment 25 party handbook: tarp will be purchased prior to any and all future parties. Aforementioned tarp will be placed on floor. Any and all sick patrons must relocate to tarp preceding the event of expulsion of bodily fluids. Failure to do so will result in ejection of guilty patron and banishment of the accused from succeeding party. All patrons must read and sign a copy before entry is granted.
He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
I have a new favorite bar game. It's called, get dressed up and go drinking alone then make up random stories of why you are alone to look less like an alc
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
Haha. Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards
I was so drunk that I passed out before I could do or say anything I'd regret. My low alcohol tolerance is like a guardian angel.
I added a U.S. Senator on snapchat....casual.
It all started with sending him a text about Spongebob. It escalated from there.
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
That was a beautiful concert to sleep through ...
I know - Don't let me take drugs from strangers anymore
Guess who's now on the no-fly list? If you guessed me, you'd be right.
just made a presentation to 40 students and my professor about morals and ethical issues..still drunk. at 8am. I wish I could remember how it went.
Oh the sweet dreamless sleep of drugs
You? On what? Why?
Randomize
