I'm gonna answer everything she says with 'cum on da face' until she breaks up with me...great idea or greatest idea?
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
Instead of centeral air we are getting a margaritaville machine. Thought you would enjoy our logic
i had to write a bad check to buy franzia last weekend. i have my priorities in line.
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
In order to see him, he made me facetime with his penis, which he had drawn a smile face on. Getting laid shouldn't be this difficult.
We got really stoned and then we fucked. Then he made me a panini.
Oooh, he sounds pretty classy
Actually, not at all. We were stoned so he made me a peanut butter panini. With a Rollo in the middle of it. And he left the panini press on all night. I could have died.
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
I definitely fucked a Trump supporter last night but I wouldn't let him fully admit it because then I would've had to leave and his cock and abs were too perfect
So it's official...my sex life has improved since Pokemon came out...
We ended up shitfaced at the house after the Super Bowl trying to get someone from Scientology on the phone.
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
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