I'm watching Cheaper By The Dozen. I almost forgot that Hilary Duff was a really shitty actor before she was a really shitty singer.
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
i had to take my roommates dildo out of her suitcase so I could use it
the suitcase or the dildo?
Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
You NEED to fuck him he's a doctor with one leg. Are you kidding me right now. This will definitely make the list. Plus he buys all of us drinks.
just run out there and shit all over the driveway when he comes.. and then point at him
I was more obsessed with the sweat stain on her back that was simultaneously shaped like a vagina and the virgin Mary.
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
I made out with a dude last night who has an ex wife. Is this what post grad life is about?
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
I got his number because he was "impressed with how much I could handle"...I was chasing shots with Olive Garden breadsticks...
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
Bro i just made a pipe out of a mechanical pencil and the top to an eye drop bottle. Does that make me some kind of pot god?
Don’t be alarmed my pee bowl is in your shower
He expects a blow job at the movies but won’t pay for popcorn? Does he know it’s not 2017 anymore
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