I gave up sex with dolphins for you.
i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
Ok a condom literally fell out of my underwear this morning, i have never been so confused.
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
Well the weddings in 4 days so I already got the eightball lined up and the wii fit all warmed up. Still wanna bet I wont lose 20 pounds by the wedding?
One of my coworkers just invited me to a wet t-shirt contest this weekend in honor of her son's 21st Birthday.
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
I don't know what possessed you to do that, but you have to give the stripper more money before you try to check her oil or they are going to throw us out every time you do that.
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
You tried crawling through the apartment window instead of going through the wide open door next to it
You peed in a public fountain and then felt bad so you put dish soap in it; 4 ft tall bubbles.
Uber southern baptist grandma and uber flaming cousin just got into an argument about whether jesus is OK with gay marriage. Aren't these things only supposed to happen at Thanksgiving?
Randomize