It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.
Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
I am literally hand feeding my crying ex boyfriend taco bell. What has my life become?
I may be in the process of acquiring a second male fuck buddy and dating a girl....FUCKING STOP THE TRAIN I'M ON! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!!
I woke up at 5:47 in the morning to you peeing on my parents bedroom floor. I think we've established that you have a limit .
you texted me "dude im face"
it sounded so right at the time
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
Btw, you're my emergency contact at Planned Parenthood
Have you ever had to act sober and talk to an authority figure in a coconut bra? Because it is just as degrading as you would imagine.
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
I just got a snapchat of a flaccid penis with the caption "happy belated valentine's day." What did I do to deserve this
She said my mask was creepy, took it off with her teeth, and proceeded to bite my neck. I love vampires.
i think if a sober person was watching us they would have not thought we were witty
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
Randomize
