doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
dude. I'm so drunk.
pete, this is bryce's mom
I can't wait to have my cock in your ass
pete, this is still bryce's mom
If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
They threw me out of the bar because I was arguing business ethics with the owner of th bar
Just saw a maroon grand am stop on my street, the driver opened the door, vomited, and then drove away like nothing happened. Been there, done that.
i'm not sure when it happened but apparently now it's topless bar night, im wearing a leotard and everyone is looking at me like i'm cheating.
He came home all fucked up crying slammed his bedroom door and all we could hear for about three hours was THIS ISN'T GONA RUIN MYLIFe what happend
I told him I got this chick pregnant and he has to get a new wingman
I think people like me is why alcohol became illegal at one point
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
Is it bad that when someone says the phrase "helicopter dick" I immediately think of you?
if you're the one who put those dollar bills in my bra last night, thank you because I just used that money to get myself a coffee
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
You can't give me tequila around boys who have girlfriends. That ain't new.
I'm so bored I talked to the Bible guys for 30 minutes.
I offered them beer last time they came here bahaha
Remember that time you puked in the middle of wendy's?
Yeah, why?
The staff still remembers me for cleaning it up. Thanks for the free frosty and fries
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