biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
I just realized I've stolen a hat from every guy I fucked. Except the last one. Maybe there is hope for me.
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
I'm amazed your boyfriend is still with you, how do you manage to pee on him while he is holding you in his lap?
you never texted me what you wanted from the store so I got a piece of chicken and bottle of tequila. if you want anything else you are on your own.
But Alex is drunk in Philly and I told him to come see me so that's "first-love,-drunk,-high,-and-it's-a-snow-day-hook-up-with-an-ex" points. 69
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
So, I'm drinking, and I put my head down in the table. The cat jumped up to check on me, I have a cat sober monitor.
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
Successful first night. Lost my phone. Front desk found it. Earthquake in wine country. Didn't feel it.
I was masturbating and a roofer walked past my bedroom window.
Driving, getting head and talking to your boss on the phone is not a good combination. I nearly died
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
I am texting my ex and my future boyfriend while eating fish and chips with my current boyfriend... How and when did I become such a terrible person???
Randomize
