i just made my mom cry by blowing spit bubbles.
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
You kicked in the door when she was blowing him. You dont remember do you?
They were picking gravel out of my face for an hour. I think I took more out of the road than the road did of me.
Barfights against pavement aren't genrally won by people. Props.
I should work for the FBI. Or planned parenthood.
That's quite a broad spectrum. What did you do?
Trial is expected to last a fucking week if I get chosen.
To be fair, you are the kind of person I want to be on the jury when I inevitably end up in front of one.
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
I went with plan f. get drunk and start a fire in my yard
So how do I tell him I've been sleeping with his wife too?
Sometimes you have good days, sometimes m you delete 360 screenshots off your camera roll.
Randomize
