ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
burritoes are like sleeping bags for ground beef
Cognac is not meant to be taken in shots. I just wanted you to know the desperation of last night.
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
I am lonely and I want to touch your beard
Just broke my collar bone. May not make it to the party.
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
You told your mom that it was your second day sober. I think she believed it until you jumped off the balcony
Funny how I'm trusting a magic 8 ball I found in the kids toy section to tell me about my sex life
You walked up to a random girl on the street and asked her for a bite of her pizza...
Sabotage it. Cum quick. Make it awkward so you don't hurt her feelings. Who says nice guys finish last?
I realized it was late, and he was my brother in humanity and another incarnation of my own life force and consciousness, so I regained control of myself, thanked him for helping me, and went home.
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
Oh my god, my vagina is cursed. He's cursed my vagina so that no one but him can maintain a boner around me. I'm sure of it.
You spent twenty minutes waxing poetic about her ass and her thighs
Randomize
